We had our CMDS welcome BBQ today, and Susan told me how much she enjoys my blog, and that she always checks to see if I have posted--and since I have been quite sparse with the blogging lately, Susan this one is for you.
I am currently doing an elective at St Paul's Hospital in Saskatoon, in Nephrology. It was because of time I spent there in second year with a certain amazing attending that I became interesting in Internal medicine in the first place. I then spent some more time there after second year in the summer and fell in love with internal medicine and specifically the kidney. There is just something about it, hard to explain--thinking through kidney problems comes more easily to me than most other systems.
So this past week was awesome. I think this is likely to be my best elective in terms of educational yield per hour spent at the hospital. We are busy all day, but its busy seeing patients with our attending, with oodles of bedside teaching. The attending staff are a blast to work with--they have SO much fun doing their jobs, and its a wonderful enviroment to work it. I would recommend this rotation as an elective or selective to any and all med students. Several of the attendings were encouraging me to come and join their nephrology group when I was finished training (which is always nice encouragement).
However...
I realized today that none of the female attendings in this department have children. And their pagers go off literally every five to ten minutes. My attending comes in before we (the residents and I) get there in the morning, and stays for hours after we leave. Kidney patients are really sick generally and there are many of them. By Friday I realized, thats really not the life I want.
I want to like my job, but not to the exclusion of everything else. There are other areas of internal medicine that are not as busy, where my pager would not go off every five minutes for the rest of my life, and I might even be able to attend my kids recitals. Heck I might even see my husband long enough to make children! It may mean a field that I have to work harder at to learn the material because it doesnt come so naturally, but I will be able to do it.
Furthermore, I read a chilling article in the Globe and Mail this weekend about euthanasia in Australia, and and one about abortion in Canada, and I had a sickening feeling in my stomach. I had a vision of the disregard for the sanctity of life eating away at the fabric of our society like a black cancer. And in my mind's eye, I saw that every couple that chose to bring life into the world or chose to preserve life would push back some of the cancer. After I read that I told Eddie we should have 10 kids. He said sure.
Basically I need to make sure I dont let myself become SO consumed with medicine that I miss all the other things God has called me to that will make a difference in His Kingdom.
5 comments:
So true, I used to think that my exciting political career was so important. Until I had a baby, and then you have the realization that playing patty cake is truly more rewarding and has just as much potential to change the world.
Thanks Lauren. I hope you find an area that suits you. Good luck on the anticipated ten kids.
-Susan
It certainly is a challenging life...one way or another....
As I have come to understand it is exceedingly important to find that balance in life in order to do what God has called us to do and to enjoy the life path He has set out for us. Keep on having fun figuring it out.
I think that God is powerful enough to use us to make a difference in His kingdom through whatever He wants -- whether that be motherhood or medicine or a combination of both.
I have a lot of friends who think that if they have a lot of children that they regard life as more holy than people who have no kids, or only a few kids. I don't understand why.
I too get absolutely livid when I hear about abortions or abuse of children. However, I don't think that having children or the number of children you have directly correlates with one's views on the sanctity of life.
I think we can nurture life by having children, taking care of the world's children, or doing a combination of both. It is not limited to just one option.
dear anonymous,
I agree that we can nuture life by taking care of other people's children as well as our own---I intend to still finish becoming a physician, and to practice medicine with the intention of doing it for the Glory of the Kingdom.
I do struggle with finding balance, because I know a lot of physicians for whom their children are essentially accessories to their storybook lives, sort of like a Prada bag. That's not what I want--what I desire is to have children who are loved and cherished and who are taught to love Jesus and to be a light in the darkness of our crazy world, whether I wind up having 2 kids, 4 kids or 10 kids.
Thanks for your comment.
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