Babies

I am on call today for the Neonatal Intensive Care (NICU). We attended the delivery of 24 week old baby, and it was all I could do to not burst into tears in the delivery suite. I am much too emotional to be able to deal with children who are sick on a regular basis for the rest of my life. The little guy was doing as okay as can be expected, but something inside of me twists in anguish each time I see his frail itty-bitty body struggling to breath, his tiny chest wall heaving with each breath.

And then there was another precious little doll who came back from Saskatoon today that I had to admit. She had been small for her gestational age, and thus is the most delicate perfectly small proportions. Her eyes were larger than the rest of her face, and she was alert and awake, with luminous blue eyes gazing out at me. I had to stop what I was doing and just cuddle her for a solid 10 minutes. This is the other reason I could never be a pediatrician--I would fall in love with all the babies and then not get my work done, and be an emotional mess when it was time to remain calm under pressure.

They really are the most vulnerable members of our society, these the sickest of our littlest people. It truly is a reflection of the society as to how we deal with and treat these our most vulnerable who most need our protection. It is quite poignant seeing the droves of adults swarmed around one little body all vigourously working to revive it, willing it to live. If we do not retain this drive to protect our little ones, we will on the whole be in big trouble. It is our job to be the voice for those cannot speak for themselves--our youngest and our elderly.